Having a daughter on the other side of the world is the strangest thing. It's not really what I expected, at least not yet. There are moments when I get lost in thought about her. And every time I look at her picture, it makes me smile. She is such a sweet looking baby!
But that's just it - all I know about her is what she looks like. I want so desperately to feel some sort of bond or attachment with her. So far this wait (granted it's only been three days) hasn't been so bad. We have done a few baby-related things, like print copies of her pictures to have around, and purchased a few outfits for her. We have even collected everything we need for her welcome bag; we just need to assemble it now.
I think I thought the moment we got our referral my life would change and things would be somewhat "magical" and agonizing at the same time. Truth is, I don't really feel that different. And I feel awful for saying that.